5 Experts Reveal The First 5 Steps In Order To Get Your Ex-Girlfriend Back

How To Make Your Ex Want You Back - Woman walking away on the beach

How To Make Your Ex Want You Back - Woman walking away on the beach

EVERY SINGLE HUMAN-BEING FOLLOWS PROCESSES… 

It’s how we live our lives whether we know it or not

We don’t simply get a loaf of bread. We need to prepare the ingredients and put it in the oven first

It’s the same for relationships

How we get out of them, and how we get into them

Getting into a relationship has a process. Even with your Ex-Girlfriend. It’s simply a matter of following the right steps in the right order

She needs to feel a certain way first before she can feel anything else…

Recently I harassed some fellow relationship experts and asked them to give up their first 5 steps to getting an Ex-Girlfriend back

How they go about priming a woman’s mind to get her ready to give him another chance…

And with some arm twisting, they did.

The First  5 Steps to Successfully Getting Your Ex Back

STEP #1 – Noticing The Wall Your Ex Has Put Between the Two of You

I remember my first ever relationship, a couple of weeks before she broke up with me that there was something different…

She wasn’t as spontaneous, and looking back I think she had something on her mind

Dating expert Clay Andrews says that this is the first step in turning things around

You may be further down the line than this but it’s important to think back to when you noticed a shift in her

You’ll know because:

  • She stopped sharing things with you
  • She didn’t look at you the same way
  • She started cancelling plans all of a sudden

And although you may think the break-up came out of the blue, if you give it some thought it could help you reconsider…

Was there a day where things were different (like I noticed) or maybe it happened slowly over time?

Either way, the first step to getting your ex-girlfriend back is to notice when things tapered off…

If you’re having trouble pinpointing the situation, Clay has kindly put this video together to help…

And you can find out more about Clay’s teaching and program by taking this quiz here or find his eBook that’s titled ‘The 5 Phases to Get Your Ex Back’ here.

Step #2: Understand What Is Pushing Her Away

“There’s a huge misconception among men that if they upset their girlfriend then they’re going to lose her.” – Psychologist Christopher Canwell

Although it sounds like the opposite of what you should do, upsetting your girlfriend is NOT necessarily what is pushing her away (99% of the time at least)

Instead, it’s boring, being predictable and generally ‘playing it safe’. Your girlfriend wants to feel what it’s like to be a player in the game, ride the bumps, get knocked down occasionally, and score the winning goal…

Not watch from the sidelines

She wants to feel the range of emotion that comes from being with a man. It keeps her guessing, she loves the drama and uncertainty of it

Believe it or not, keeping her in this state has been scientifically researched and thought to increase attraction.

If you play it too nice and are too safe then she won’t feel these emotions, and she will start looking for someone who can give them to her…

The big take away here is not to overcompensate. It’s a trap that many guys fall into. A lot of guys think their girlfriend is going to leave them and they overcompensate by buying flowers, crying and saying ‘I can change for you’

She DOES NOT WANT YOU TO CHANGE. If anything she wants you to go back to the guy you were, the man that she once was attracted to and that she desired.

What type of guy were you when she desired you more than anyone? You can see more of Christopher’s advice about how to be that guy again here.

Step #3: Back off

This step follows right on from the previous step, and like most of Michael Sweeney’s advice it doesn’t mess around

‘Back off’ with your attention and affection

Here’s a question for you…

Has any of the following crossed your mind?

  • Calling her because you just need to tell her something that will make it all OK
  • Talking to her friends about convincing her to get back with you
  • Sending her messages on social media about how you want to commit to her

If they have then get them out of your mind. These ideas are coming out of neediness and aren’t attractive at all. They are not going to help you get her back

And if you have done any of these, then let’s agree right now that it needs to stop

Michael Sweeney says that these behaviors are actually pushing her further away…

So the third step is really about stopping something if you are doing it, not so much about doing something different

Michael says that women make decisions based on how they feel about the relationship they have with someone at that very moment

And if she feels that you need her (which these three behaviors demonstrate) she won’t want all the pressure and will run the other way

The trick is don’t ask her to be back with you when she doesn’t feel good towards you. She won’t give you the answer you are looking for

But when she:

  • Feels better about you
  • Is once again excited to see you
  • Starts making plans to hang out again

She will reconsider..

So how do you give her that giddy feeling she craves when she’s in your presence again? Michael reveals all in his book ‘Get Her Back: FOR MEN ONLY’ available here

Step #4:

(Part A) – If You Did Something To Cause the Breakup (i.e. cheating) Then Apologize

Step four is broken up into two parts because they go together

Firstly in part A, if you did something that caused the breakup, like cheating or just being overly stupid for a lot of the time then apologise

She needs to know that you are serious about this. And that it meant something when you said sorry

It’s vitally important that you do this honestly and sincerely

You can do it face to face, with SMS, but a letter (handwritten) I think is the best way to get the message across…

Why a letter? A letter gives her the power. She can read it when she wants, and take the time to process it how she likes

It’s also something that you don’t typically do (im guessing), so the communication channel hasn’t been potentially corrupted by fights, or mundane messages like ‘can you get the bread tonight?’ etc.

There’s also just something about receiving a handwritten letter. You know that someone has put time and thought about it. and there’s feeling in it

Anyhow, you need to tell her something like…

“I love you, but we both know that I’ve made a huge mistake. It’s something that I think about every day

I’d like to say that I’m strong enough not to fall into temptation again, but the truth is I need to become a better man

I know that I have hurt you by the way that you have acted. I understand that when you act out towards other people you are really venting your frustration with me. I am sorry

I want us to be stronger than ever, and I know if I can work past my faults that we can move past this. You mean the world to me.”

Part B – Acknowledge that the relationship is over

The hard truth of the matter is that the relationship you had with your girlfriend is over…

If you get your ex-girlfriend back, you will be starting a new relationship with her

The old one faded because there was something about it or you that wasn’t right…

You weren’t mature enough, you lost interest, you lost respect for each other, you weren’t ready, etc.

Now is the time to tell her, that you accept that it’s over

This step is crucial. If you don’t do this, then she will think that she has broken it off with you and that’s final

You don’t want this. Time to suck it up and let her know that now, it’s ‘mutual’

You can also do it in a letter, face-to-face or SMS. Either way, you want to say something along the lines of…

“I want you to know that I have cherished the time being with you and I wouldn’t take it back or change it for anything

But I agree with you that our relationship is over and this chapter of our lives has come to an end”

You really want to let her know that its over…

It gets rid of the expectations, the labels and all the bad stuff that is actually weighing down your future together (although she may not know that last bit)

And it will help you to start building that future together, even though it sounds counter-intuitive

So how do you start rebuilding that shared future, where the two of you grow old and wrinkly together? Michael reveals his Get-Your-Ex-Back plan including messages you can copy and paste to re-spark the attraction again in his book  ‘Text Your Ex Back’ available here

Step 5 – The No Contact Plan

In this step, Brad Browning gives us his best tip for getting your ex back

“The no contact strategy”

This basically means from the date that you told your Ex that you accept the relationship is over, for the next 4 weeks do not contact her

He says this works for 3 main reasons…

Absence

Using absence in your favor is an extremely powerful force that can draw your Ex back to you, all by itself

Time will settle any negative emotions she has so the more positive ones can come back

Ever noticed how your memory you typically only remember the fun stuff. Primary school is a good example. While you were there you were probably bored most of the time, but no when you look back it was the best time of your life…

We aren’t going to leave it that long, but some time can help heal and reveal what’s really important in someone’s life. And this is to your advantage

Confidence

Your confidence levels will rise because you are starting to take charge.

When you’re going through a break-up, no contact is really the only strategy you can control.

You can’t pick up the phone, because she may not answer so by taking charge, you are starting to get confident again

And you need your confidence to be the ‘you’ that she fell for in the first place

Time to Plan

No contact will also level out your emotions and let you put together some kind of plan. It will help you and give you time to do some self-development and learning so you can become a better man.

This is vital to your pursuit

Your previous relationship proved that the person who you were wasn’t ready. Now it’s time to improve.

  • Learn how to communicate better
  • Dress better
  • etc.

So what type of plan should you put together when you want to reunite with your Ex-Girlfriend?

Brad reveals his three-step plan in his highly recommended book called ‘The Ex Factor.’ You can get your copy here

There is also a chapter in there on how to become a better man so your ex-girlfriend won’t be able to resist you…

The next steps…

These 5 steps may feel like they are taking you away from your Ex. But think of them as demolishing the old stuff that didn’t work and putting down the foundation down for a new relationship.

At the end of the day, the foundation doesn’t look like much but it’s the most important part of the house

It keeps everything else standing…

And in this case, it puts you in a place where you can go forward knowing that you’ve got the rest of you covered and you have the best chance of getting your Ex-Girlfriend Back

Again i’d like to say thanks to the experts who helped put this article together. If you’d like to see any more of their advice then here it is:

  1. Clay Andrews: Relationship Inner Game
  2. Christopher Canwell: Girlfriend Recovery System
  3. Michael Sweeney: Get Her Back
  4. Michael Fiore: Text the Ex Back
  5. Brad Browning: The Ex Factor

If you have any questions or queries then contact me here.

 

Other Resources

  • https://modernlove.life/how-to-make-your-ex-miss-you/
  • http://www.romancetriggers.com/
  • https://www.meetyoursweet.com/men/blog/ive-changed-but-she-wont-forgive-me/
  • https://www.meetyoursweet.com/men/blog/why-experts-say-no-contact-is-bad-theyre-lying-to-you/

The Top 10 Best Pick Up Artist Books

Best Pick Up Artist Books - Man chatting to woman in cafe

Best Pick Up Artist Books - Man chatting to woman in cafe

THE PICK UP ARTISTS IN these books have all turned their lives around

They all started off as nervous, timid and socially awkward guys who couldn’t even get a date…

Now they are dating superheroes

Many of them were spurred on, learning from guys who had come before them…

Now they are the ones giving advice. Helping guys like you by revealing what works for them, as well as stories from their experiences

Here are the top 10 pick up books I found and have read. They are in no particular order and offer something a little different…

 

tao of badass book and bonuses

Tao of Badass – Joshua Pellicer

This is more of an encyclopedia than a book. There is plenty of content to go through and the level of detail is very thorough.

Not only are there details on what to say/do etc, but also plenty of ‘inner game’ stuff, stories about what to do (and what not to do), unique concepts and the typical tips and techniques.

The Tao of Badass isn’t just a book. It includes videos, audio and plenty of bonuses which why it costs a little more than the other options on this list.

You can get your copy of TAO OF BADASS here as well as read a more DETAILED REVIEW here

 

The Mystery Method: How to Get Beautiful Women Into Bed – Mystery (aka Eric Von Markovik)

Mystery is really a geek when it comes to meeting women…

The part of ‘getting laid’ that most guys think is by chance, he has been turned into a Science

In his book, he goes into minute detail and spells out the rules of how to meet women for you

Although this book isn’t going to solve all the challenges you face, after reading it you can expect that your odds will improve

The best thing about what Mystery has done is that he has done it a lot, and in this book, he gives away some of his ‘rules of thumb’. Including:

  • How long it takes to go from meeting to sleeping with a woman (on average)
  • How long you should wait before you make your approach
  • The best way to bypass her ‘buyers remorse’ trigger

Some of the books is a little outdated, but the ideas, message and Mystery’s rules of thumb are still relevant. And because of this, it’s worth a read, especially for those who haven’t read many (or any) pick up books before

The Mystery Method is very structured and the book will give readers a complete view (and timeline) of those important first few hours when meeting a woman

You can get your copy and read more reviews of The Mystery Method here

 

The Way of the Superior Man – David Deida

David Deida isn’t a pick up artist. But this book has been handed down by pick up artists for as long as I can remember

It’s all about dealing with the stresses and challenges that come from work, women and sexual desire

This isn’t simply woo-woo nonsense, although the reasons why may not be clear to readers

It’s centered around male spirituality, but there are also practical aspects that men can follow

However, the book is typically written in that meta kind of way that spiritual books are typically written in. Topics include*:

  • Live with an open heart even when it hurts
  • Don’t force the feminine to make decisions
  • Live as if your father were dead
  • What she wants is not what she says

If you need to focus on your ‘inner-game’ (the reasons why you act as you do) then this is the book for you.

Well worth the read, there is a lot of wisdom in this book

Get your copy of THE WAY OF THE SUPERIOR MAN here

*Topics I have taken are from my copy which is about 10 years old. The version available now may be updated

 

Unlock her legs book and bonuses

Unlock Her Legs – Bobby Rio (& Rob Judge)

Unlike the other books on this page, unlock her legs deals with the question…

‘There’s this one girl, how do I get her?’

Whether you have been relegated to the ‘friend zone’, your relationship went a little sour or she doesn’t even really know who you are (be honest here) then this book is for you

It covers how to change her perception of you, then how to turn her from just a friend into something more.

As far as how the book reads, Bobby talks like a typical New Yorker. Crude and straight to the point. There are stories to illustrate points but it’s mostly a ‘what to do and how to do it’ type book.

If you haven’t read any other pick up books, you will be surprised by the level of detail that Bobby Rio and Rob Judge (co-author) have in this area.

Unlock her legs comes with audiobook and plenty of bonuses reports. (see image)

Well worth a read. Find out more and get your copy of UNLOCK HER LEGS here

 

Magnetic Messaging

Magnetic Messaging – Bobby Rio (& Rob Judge)

Although some will promise it, there is no such thing as a magical set of words that will get her to fall in love with you…

But what there is, is a way of communicating with a woman that demonstrates to her that you are a confident, smart and attractive..

Which she won’t be able to resist

This book helps you by showing you what confident, smart and attractive guys are saying to girls.. that is working

It reveals many of the exact lines that Bobby and Rob use themselves to meet and escalate romance with women that they meet.

Although it is a little dated, the principles and texts still work just as well today

When I was new to meeting women, using text messages I ‘borrowed’ from other guys was one of the best learning experiences.

It gave me more motivation, which then only made it a matter of time before I could meet and attract women when I wanted.

You can get your copy of MAGNETIC MESSAGING here

 

Brent Smith - Attract Hotter Women

Attract Hotter Women – Brent Smith

Brent Smith is kind of the odd one out when it comes to this list.

He’s not your typical guy who learned a lot about meeting women. And he’s not going to teach you about meeting women in the street or at the local nightclub.

He’s a playboy.

The old-school type. World travelling, Tuxedo wearing, Celebrity mingling … and he only ever dates ’10s’.

As you can tell by the name of his book, he has refined taste when it comes to everything, including women

This book is another ‘what to do, how to do’ type book that covers the topic of meeting higher value women (which are also typically better looking)

It includes areas around increasing your social status and how to generate a vibe that will attract beautiful women to you

Get your copy of Brent Smith’s ATTRACT HOTTER WOMEN here

 

Complete Hooked System

Hooked! Proven secrets that make women addicted to being with you – Tripp Kramer

Tripp is a pretty regular guy. Originally from the Midwest, this book is the result of his journey to meeting women and socializing in his new city (Los Angeles).

The breakthrough in this book is that you don’t need to be an alpha male or someone you’re not to have the dating life you want.

In some ways the book has more regular, ‘what-you-would-expect’ advice. Tips on how you dress, what to say to keep the interaction moving along, body language stuff etc.

Tripp also harnesses the power of NLP to help build deeper connections with women. And covers more specific topics like how to arrange your living space to make women feel more comfortable there.

Good for guys who want to keep it simple, and use less of the ‘hacks and tricks’.

Get your copy of HOOKED here

 

The Game – Neil Strauss

This is the classic tale of a guy who has entered the world of the pickup artists by befriending one of the most prominent at the time (Mystery).

Although this book is a little dated now, it shows a behind the scenes view of the world of the pick up artist. Including information on some of the big names.

This book isn’t about giving you tips or what to say etc. The lesson this book taught me was that ‘pick up’ is about is about becoming a better man, and essentially outgrowing ‘pick up’.

It’s worth a read. You can get your copy of THE GAME here

 

The Dating Playbook for Men – Andrew Ferebee

Like many, Andrew Ferebee has read and tried many different tactics and techniques when it comes to meeting women

And after letting it all simmer in his brain, the most important thing to him isn’t tips, routines or strategies… it’s being a grounded male

This book is about what’s inside you. And how to bring that when you’re out meeting women

On the con side, it is a little sales-y where the author plugs his programs at the end of the chapter

But despite this, it’s worth a read. It will help keep you grounded and it sets the tone for what is important when you meet a woman

Get your copy of The Dating Playbook for Men here

 

 

Sperm Wars – Robin Baker

Like David Deida, Robin Baker is not a pick up artist. But this book has done the rounds as well. It’s a real eye-opener when it comes to the science of sex

In fact, I’d even go so far as to say that unless you read this book, you don’t really understand the mechanics of sex

And by understanding the mechanics, you will understand more of the things that happen in interactions between you and the women you’re interested in

Because at the end of the day, sex is what it’s all about

For example, if you have ever wondered why a girl chases one particular guy but runs away from others then the answer is in this book

If you’re wondering if you can read and understand a science book (some of them are quite hard) this one is not all dry facts, big words and statistics.

Each chapter starts with a story, then an explanation. To be honest it is written well enough that an average reader will have no trouble understanding (I had no trouble)

Get your copy of SPERM WARS here

Thanks for reading…

If you haven’t read a book about pick up before, then I can confidently say that these books will change your life

Just like the pick up artists who wrote them, they can open a door to what feels like another world

They changed my life (for the better) and now I don’t know where I would be without them. I hope they have the same positive influence on your life too.

My 10 Best Books on Pleasing a Woman – An Updated List

Books on how to please a woman - Woman sitting on edge of bed

Books on how to please a woman - Woman sitting on edge of bed

LEARNING ABOUT WOMEN ISN’T LIKE learning about other subjects

  • You can’t really ask her what she wants (she doesn’t know)
  • It’s hard to find other guys who will actually help you
  • And your friends probably don’t know what to do either

It can feel like you are either born with it or you aren’t

But rest assured there is help for the rest of us. Here are 10 books, videos, and other resources, to help you really understand what’s going on with her…

And how to make her happy, and loyal. Go through these and you will be the man that she will always remember, and never want to leave

1. She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman – Ian Kerner

Are you  “Ill-Clit-erate?”

If you are like most guys you may have far more idea of what hides under the hood of your car or the box on your computer than what goes on under the hood of the female clitoris.

Ian explains that for a woman, sex is more than foreplay and intercourse; it’s a complete package from start to climax.

She Comes First is a virtual encyclopedia of how to pleasure a woman, covering dozens of techniques that have been proven to work time and time again. Learning how to pleasure a woman can turn you into the man that she can’t stop thinking about.

Get your copy of She Comes First here

Pros Cons
Contains detailed instructions Poorly organized
Covers the art and science behind sex Repetitive
Shows you how to succeed without toys Deals mainly with oral sex

2. The Way of the Superior Man – David Deida

How to become a man’s man and more

In “The Way of the Superior Man,” author David Deida takes an in-depth look at every aspect of men’s lives.

He covers issues such as career and family, love and spirituality, and women and love. Deida offers advice designed to help men learn how to live a more masculine life. One of authenticity, integrity, and freedom.

The chapters are short and to the point, making the book easy to read. Providing you read the entire book and apply the lessons, you will find yourself becoming a far more confident man who is ready to take charge of his life.

I have this book in my bookshelf, you can get your copy here

Pros Cons
Chapters are short and to the point Ideas are somewhat archaic  
Helpful for those looking to build a long-term relationship Repetitive and excessive use of filler
Shows men how to focus on their relationship and to take more responsibility for it Overly simplistic writing style

3. Various DVD’s – Welcomed Consensus

Sex Ed. for visual learners

I know I said books but these DVD’s deserve their place in this list.

I first found Welcomed Consensus a few years ago. And when it comes to teaching sex and the woman’s body, I don’t think anyone does it with as much detail

Personally, I found it valuable because when you are ‘in the moment’ you may only have a small window to get it right. Whereas these DVD’s slow things down and show exactly what you should be doing, for how long, when to stop, etc.

Some may see it as porn, but I would classify it more as ‘instruction manual DVD’

If you need simple instructions with plenty of visuals, then this is the place for you. They have their entire catalog available here, as well as a few choice videos on Amazon

Pros Cons
Extreemly detailed Very graphic (not for everyone)
Simple to understand The production level isn’t great
Answers a lot of questions Videos are shortish (30mins)

4. The Language of Lust – Lawrence LanoffLanguage of Lust - Michael Fiore

Lawrence has written the upgrade most guys are looking for when it comes to getting more and better sex.

The book/program is set around the idea that the physical attraction isn’t everything. In fact, it is only a single part of the experience for a woman, and women get turned on more by the ‘story’ or lead up than by the act.

On the more practical side, there are plenty of techniques which make things easy to remember. It’s a great resource for men, single or partnered.

Get your copy of The Language of Lust here

Pros Cons
Plenty of techniques No hard copy available, only digital
Easy to understand A little dated
60-day money back guarantee Membership site hard to navigate

5. My Secret Garden – Nancy Friday

More than erotica, a real-life view of women’s sexual fantasies

Some see My Secret Garden as one of the most sexually freeing books written, while others see it as no more than pornography

My Secret Garden is in fact “a collection of women’s sexual fantasies,” which due to the nature of the topic is certain to be at least somewhat erotic

Although it’s a little dated, it’s rare that you will find women openly sharing their innermost thoughts, so there are new insights for men here. And I really like how straightforward and honest it has been compiled

My Secret Garden can enhance not only sex lives but also relationships and provide a deeper understanding into the so-called fairer sex. Get your copy here.

Pros Cons
Entertaining read No real practical element
Great insights into women Very graphic language
Informative  Gets a bit weird in parts

6. Sex, Your Woman and You – Don Asterwood

Don Asterwood has put together a real guide on how the average guy can please a woman

And his answer lies in three areas. Having confidence, the correct knowledge and applying the right technique

Much of what we learn from friends and movies is not really correct and doesn’t work as intended. This book aims to dispell those myths and show you what works.

It’s written in a language that’s easy to read and upfront about the advice in it. Get your copy of Sex, Your Woman and You here

Pros Cons
Easy to read Very specific about sexual knowledge
Frank everyday language This author may not be for everyone
Plenty of content in the book Not for advanced ‘users’

7. 500 Lovemaking tips – Michael Webb

500 Lovemaking Tips & Secrets

Is the sizzle between you and your woman starting to fade?

If you have been looking for ways to spice up your love life, 500 Lovemaking Tips is sure to help.

Filled with 500 tips & strategies that are easy to put into action, with step-by-step instructions to help ensure you understand each tip. The descriptions are well thought out and easy to follow, with as much detail as is needed to ensure you comprehend the entire concept.

Keeping the spark alight in your relationship can be challenging, especially if you have been together for a long time. By following these tips, you can rekindle the flame and turn it into a towering inferno.

Get your copy of 500 Lovemaking Tips by Michael Webb here

Pros Cons
Based on real-life experiences Takes a lot of reading
Easy to understand Only available as an eBook
Guaranteed results (money back) Can be overwhelming

8. Revolutionary Sex – Alex Allman

revolutionary sex - Alex Allman

Three Ways to Give a Woman the Best Orgasms She Has Ever Had

This is an excellent guide to sex for beginners to help them learn what it takes to truly satisfy a woman in bed.

You will learn how to overcome issues that stop a woman from having an orgasm and men from gaining an erection. Revolutionary Sex teaches you about the female anatomy and how to locate the “G-Spot.”

Learn about “sexual trust” and the importance for a woman to be unable to tell her partner about her sexual needs. Revolutionary Sex explains the importance of oral sex and how to perform it on both men and women.

The book also includes a female and male version as an audiobook. Available here

Pros Cons
Focus is on most important parts of sex Not exactly revolutionary information
Comes with male and female audio version Distinct lack of diagrams
Detailed instructions Text can be challenging to read

9. 100 Great sex games for couples – Michael Webb

100 Great Sex Games for Couples

More fun in the bedroom

100 Great Sex Games for Couples offers more than just 100 games for you and your partner to inject into your sex life.

There are plenty of books that do just that and nothing more. Author Michael scoured the world to find the best sex games, added a few of his own and unleashed it on an unsuspecting public.

The games in this book are refreshingly new, are not complicated or difficult to prepare for, and are neither degrading nor immoral. Treat your partner to some of the hottest sex they have ever experienced and leave them wondering who the new you is.

When your ready to play, your copy of 100 Great Sex Games for Couples is here

Pros Cons
Available as a PDF download Only available online
Easy to understand Contains 33 games and 67 variants
60-day money back guarantee Requires a lot of creativity and imagination

10. Turn Your Wife into Your Own Personal Sex Kitten – Michael Fiore

Text Your Wife Into Bed - Michael Fiore

Purrrrr!!!!

Text Your Wife into Bed will show you how to have your special lady seeing you as her personal love god all through the power of the simple text message.

Author Michael Fiore teaches you a variety of different ways you can text your wife that will turn them on and make them want you.

Success is achieved by following the four-step process in the book. The process is laid out in easy to understand language. Once you purchase the program, you get an audio file, a video, and the PDF to download. Get yours here

Pros Cons
Easy to follow and understand Success takes time and patience
Proven track record of success Use of “dirty” language
60-day money-back guarantee Only works for those who like texting

In Summary…

If you read, listened to and watched everything here, I cannot see you having a problem with pleasing women in your future

The truth is that pleasing women doesn’t start in the bedroom. It’s the type of man you are and how you treat your woman. I think as a whole, these books and resources reflect that

Now go and study and make that woman feel the way she deserves

If you are looking for resources on how to meet women then these books are more for you

Any questions on this article, the best books on pleasing a woman, contact me here

How to be Confident with Women & 2 Tips to Hack Your Self-Esteem

How to be confident with women - Guy talking to a group of girls doing cheers motion

How to be confident with women - Guy talking to a group of girls doing cheers motion

IF YOU ARE LIKE many guys trying to get better with women, you may think that all you need to appear more confident is do more:

  • Say more stuff to her
  • Have more techniques to approach her
  • Have more pickup lines

Unfortunately, talking too much is the perfect way to turn her off. A woman can always sense when you are over talking because you are nervous.

Why are guys nervous in the presence of women?

It is amazing how relaxed you are around your colleagues and friends, but the moment a pretty girl shows up, you are completely intimidated. Some of the reasons why guys clam up when they are in the presence of girls include:

Putting her on a pedestal

If many guys were to be honest, beautiful girls intimidate them because they (guys) put the girl on a pedestal before they even know her.

They feel as if the girl is a goddess and that they have to prove themselves and impress. Thinking like this will put a lot of pressure on a guy who thinks he always has to impress her and get her to like him.

The cure

Some will say that simply thinking this way ridiculous and you should try to talk yourself out of it. But from my experience this doesn’t work. The cure here is to meet (and date) more beautiful women. So that one exposure to a pretty woman isn’t as much of a big deal.

Being too hard on yourself

Many guys’ worst enemy is their own opinions about themselves.

You have a constant stream of thoughts that point out how less than perfect you are. You dwell on how you aren’t good looking; how you have physical flaws that need to be fixed; how you are a loner; that you have never kissed a girl; and that you are a loser…..

If you are too hard on yourself, you become insecure and eventually sabotage any chance you may have to be confident with girls.

The cure

While confidence and personality are more attractive to a girl than the things you are dwelling on. And you should consider for a minute that your looks and accomplishments probably don’t matter to a girl nearly as much as you think they do.

It’s hard to actually put in place. But I do have one way to fix this which is a bit of a weird one but it worked for me. Ready…

Create a different personality.

Yep. Instead of simply having you. Have different “you’s”. For instance if your name is John, you now have everyday “John”. And also “Good Time John”.

Everyday you is kinda shy around new people. He does his work and takes care of business at home, at work etc.

Good Time John goes out at night and has fun. He foremost interest is in having a good time and people who want to have a good time.

This is an overly simple explanation, but the theory behind it has helped me personally in many ways.

How to be confident with women - Guy singing karaoke with women
Singing can be seen as a sign you are confident… even if you are not a great singer

How to be confident around women

Everyone has their insecurities.

Being confident around beautiful women is not about never feeling insecure. It is about being comfortable in your own skin, and not allowing your insecurities get in the way of your pursuing girls that you are attracted to.

All confidence is acquired and developed. No man is born with confidence.

One big misconception by men that sabotages their efforts is that men have to do something to get the girl. Whether that is impress or talk or demonstrate something, etc.

Truly confident guys know that they DO NOT have to do anything. That it will happen naturally.

Analyze and destroy your self-sabotaging beliefs

Insanity is defined as doing the same thing over and over while expecting different results. If you have been struggling with feeling confident around girls, it only makes sense to see what scares you and where it comes from.

For instance, let’s say you have approach anxiety. Have you ever stopped to contemplate why you have it? Why should it be so hard to walk up and say ‘hi?’

Maybe in the back of your mind you think that people are out to get you because you were abused or bullied in your past. Or perhaps you are scared by women because your mother smothered you as a child and you always feel inferior around girls.

If you taketime to conduct a thorough analysis, you would possibly realize that most of your anxiety has nothing to do with the girl standing in front of you.

Instead it comes from experiences at various stages of your youth and adolescence. If you objectively examined what went wrong and sought for ways to deal with your past situations, you would move forward in your dating life.

Manage your expectations

Many guys fear to go to women out of fear of rejection. They are insecure, and they take rejection too seriously. Expecting to always score a date or a relationship after approaching a girl is putting way too much pressure on yourself.

Change your mindset. The worst thing that a girl can do is to say no.

The first thing you need to realize is that rejection is not personal and it may be as a result of things you have absolutely no control over.

Regardless of your game or lack thereof, many times you will be rejected. Rejection is not meaningful until you empower it.

Also, do not put too much meaning into your interaction with her. Would you care if a random guy you did not know decided that he did not particularly like you? Then, why do you allow the opinion of a girl you have only briefly interacted with matter so much to you?

Treat an attractive girl the same casual way you would treat a friend or an unattractive girl.

Do not pedestalize the girl

The ability to take a girl off the pedestal is the difference between being successful with girls and being unsuccessful.

Treating the girl you are attracted to like a regular person and not like an idol is critical to your success. Treat her with dignity and respect her, but do not let her hold power over you while you grovel at her feet.

As stated above the best way to cure this is to meet more women. The more interactions you have, the less important each one becomes.

Take it one step at a time

The idea of approaching a woman and carrying out a conversation beyond the initial ‘hi’ can be daunting for many guys. However, you can gain confidence in your conversation skills through practice.

Start by saying hi’ to women as you walk down the street. You don’t even have to start a conversation; just smile, say ‘hi’ and don’t break your stride.

This may sound all too simple but make a habit of it. Get friendly with the girls you regularly see; at the coffee shop, the fast food place, the library. Make a few remarks as you order: get them to make a suggestion and engage them in a brief chat. With time, you will get comfortable talking to women, and you will build some confidence.

Gradually start to throw out some banter and then seek to further the interaction by making the conversation personal. Within no time, you will find that you can build sexual tension.

The point is always seeking to build your skills by taking your next interaction a step further than the previous one. Keep at this, and you will be confidently talking to women in no time.

Just go for it

When you want to approach a woman, you probably find yourself hesitating.

Unfortunately, when you hesitate, your mental barrier kicks into place. It becomes even harder to approach the girl. The longer you think about whether you should approach a girl or not, the more anxious you will feel. As such, you need to act more upon that first impulse.

Your first impulse is your best shot at actually approaching and talking to a girl. All the thinking that you do after the initial intention to approach only serves to scare you.

If you don’t move fast, you will either talk yourself out of approaching the girl or do it awkwardly. If you wait to feel utterly confident to approach a girl, the chances are that it will never happen. Give yourself a few seconds and get your feet moving towards the girl.

Momentum is an incredible thing. It is hard to get moving, but once you start moving, it is hard to stop.

One last tip

Do you still need some extra push to gain confidence? You can use affirmations before approaching the girl. Tell yourself something positive:

The outcome doesn’t matter; I am sexy; women enjoy talking to me.

Have a few affirmations that resonate with you to get motivated to get out there and do it.

The final approach

The beauty with approaching women is that there is so much you are in control of:

  • You decide whom to approach
  • Your attitude towards the girl
  • Where you are comfortable approaching
  • How long you want the interaction to last
  • How you treat the outcome of the interaction

When you realize how much power you have over the situation, you will feel empowered and much more confident to approach girls.

Do not give your power away by pedestalizing the girl, looking down upon yourself and assigning too much meaning to rejection.

Dating Tips for Shy Guys – 7 Quick Wins to Help You Get the Girl

Dating tips for shy guys - a shy guy looking at a girl in a cafe

Dating tips for shy guys - a shy guy looking at a girl in a cafe

YOU HAVE A GIRL YOU ARE seriously crushing on, but you cannot muster the courage to get up and meet her. Instead you:

  • Try to figure out if the guy standing to her is her boyfriend
  • Start thinking of an opening line to say to her
  • Get nervous at the thought of looking stupid in front of your friends or getting shot down in front of hers
  • Fear that she will ignore you or worse still, reject you

And then after all the hesitation, guess what happens? The window of opportunity closes, and she goes off somewhere. You are left very frustrated……. until it happens again next time.

The Misconception

A lot of shy guys have a misconception about what it truly means to be an alpha male. Instead of trusting their gut, they have succumbed to their doubts and fears.

“I am broke, short, and ugly. People do not find me interesting.”

Rather than focusing on all their great qualities, shy guys focus only on the negatives. As a result, a guy will keep to himself, hoping to avoid being the center of attention. Unfortunately, even though the guy may have many desirable qualities, they are buried under the layers of his shyness.

The truth of the matter is that you have a lot of offer

So what if you…

  • Do not open up to every person you meet?
  • Don’t compete with other guys just so that you can get your point across?
  • Only open up in the right situation?
  • Are hesitant to jump into a conversation until you have something worthwhile to say?

It’s more normal/average/common than you think

And there is nothing wrong with you.

Being shy is not your identity. It is just one part of who you are. Being shy should not curb your aspirations to date a woman. In fact being shy can sometimes be an asset. You just have to learn how to make it work for you.

Your ‘weakness’ can be your greatest asset. Not every woman is attracted to an arrogant, cocky man.

7 Quick Wins and Dating Tips for Shy Guys

1. Realize that women are just people

Guys place so much pressure on themselves and worry too much about how a girl will perceive them.

When you feel your nerves starting to get the better of you, remind yourself that women are just people. You can be sure that the girl is experiencing a lot of the same insecurities as you and she is just as worried about what you think of her. Do not overthink everything.

Also, there is something surprising about women that you may not know:

They are incredibly forgiving of lame jokes, slips, and blunders…….. As long as they are having fun talking to you. Women do not want perfect; they want fun. So, loosen up and allow yourself room to be less than perfect.

Dating tips for shy guys - a shy guy talking to a girl in a cafe

2. Stack the odds in your favor

Finding and approaching a woman is incredibly difficult for a shy guy. It, therefore, helps if you stack the odds in your favor. Ensure your first impression is impressive.

A woman will notice how you are groomed and how you wear your clothes. Wearing nice clothes also goes a long way in boosting your confidence.

Also, spruce up your wardrobe. You do not have to spend a fortune to look stylish. A few smart casual pieces will improve your wardrobe. Oh, and remember, women always pay attention to your shoes. Always wear something that makes you feel good about yourself rather than what you think every other guy out there is wearing.

3. Play a game you can win

Going to meet girls in clubs is stacking all the decks against you. Why? Women in clubs and bars are hit on all night. Besides, they have their friends in tow. As a result, they are likely to reject a guy who tries to approach them.

Try to meet women in other places: You can try volunteering, attend weddings and other church-related functions or attend your friends’ parties. The point is to minimize competition and increase your confidence.

4. Find common interests

The easiest way to approach a woman is to find common interests. Shared interests take the focus off your attraction and place it somewhere else. The best way to link up with girls with whom you share common interests is to join clubs and groups. When you are in a club or group, doing something you enjoy, you will find it easier to strike up a conversation.

5. Read her signals

Wouldn’t it be nice to know if she is interested in you or not before you approach and start talking to her? Wouldn’t you rather approach a girl already knowing that she has an interest in getting to know you?

We have already established that there are women who like shy guys. However, no matter how much she likes you, a girl will almost never come up and ask for your number.

Unfortunately, it does not work like that.

(She’s testing you to see how much interest you have in her, and she want’s you to prove that by giving her all of your attention – in the form of talking to her)

But if you know what to look out for, a woman will give you subtle signals to show you that she is interested in you.

Unfortunately, research by National Institute of Mental Health shows that men confuse romantic signals of interest with signals of friendship 70% of their time. Research shows that the male brain is simply not hard-wired to pick up on a woman’s subtle cues.

That means you have been walking away from women who are trying to show interest in you

The Signs that a woman is interested in you:

  • She is making ‘long’ eye contact.
  • If you already know each other, she will look for excuses to touch you: a light touch on your hand shoulder and chest. A playful slap on the thigh.
  • She is smiling at you with her eyes.
  • If in a crowded place she will even bump into you by accident to get you to notice her.
  • She constantly places herself close to you: within an earshot or a shoulder tap.

6. Change your outcome

Many guys approach a woman with the intention of getting her phone number, getting a date or making her their girlfriend. They psyche themselves up and become too dependent on the outcome. When things do not go according to plan, the disappointment is astronomical.

But, what if you changed your expectation? What if you focus your mind on building your skills with women? If the woman slips, you will have gained some experience out of the interaction.

Also, since your intention is no longer to get together with the girl, you will appear less needy and, consequently, you will become more attractive.

When you finally score a date with the girl of your dreams do not expect perfection. Do not go out for a date with unrealistic expectations. Your goal should be to have fun together. In due time, you gain the confidence to express your feelings for her.

7. Change the way you view rejection

Many guys make a woman’s response to them to mean something about them personally. If a woman rejects them, they interpret it to mean that they are unattractive and undesirable.

The truth:

  • She may have a boyfriend.
  • She is not interested in meeting new people at this stage of her life.
  • You may not be her type.

When a woman rejects you, it is nothing personal. Be grateful for her feedback: whether it is positive or negative. After all, she doesn’t know you, right?

Finally, consider the following facts

Shyness is not an attribute that you need to distance yourself from. Shyness is humility and modesty and to some women, sexiness.

What you say when you are with a girl doesn’t matter much. Worry less about your words. Focus on your tone. Speak in a positive energy and women will appreciate all you have to say.

So,

Do not avoid social situations. The only way to make them less awkward is to practice them……again and again and again

You can learn social skills. Do not spend time lamenting your weakness: people skills are just that: skills, they can be learned. Do not berate yourself for not having them. Instead set about trying to learn them. There are many resources available for you to learn social skills; starting with the internet.

Thanks for reading this article on dating tips for shy guys. If you have any comments or questions, you can contact me here.

“How to Know if You Like Someone?” – The 7 Tell-Tale Signs You Want More Than Her Friendship

How to Tell if You Like Someone - Two people sitting close to each other

How to Know if You Like Someone - Two people sitting close to each other

IT MAY SOUND STRANGE TO SAY that you do not know whether you like someone or not. ..

But the truth is that you can be completely ignorant of the fact that you have developed feelings for someone else.  Experts say that this happens the most with someone you have known for a long time.

Luckily, your body has some sneaky ways of tipping you off when you have romantic feelings for someone.

Your mind can play tricks on your feelings.

Another reason why it is important to be sure of the nature of the feelings you have for someone else is your very own brain.  Your brain can inhibit you from truly realizing your feelings for another person. For instance, you might be convinced that you cannot possibly have feelings for a certain person because of this or that reason.

Sometimes, you may also think that you have feelings for someone because you are lonely.  When you are lonely, you unconsciously search for companionship.  Maybe you like spending time with a certain individual because you do not want to be alone.

Explore your hidden feelings.

There are many signs that literally scream: ‘Hey, you like that girl!’  The trick is to pull down your blinders and examine how you truly feel about her.  And you must be willing to be completely honest with yourself.

Keep an eye on these telltale signs the next time you aren’t sure about your feelings for a certain woman.

You think about her… a lot

If you like a girl, you may feel like you cannot get her off your mind.  Scientists say that this is because when you like someone, your brain releases phenylethylamine; also known as the love drug.  This is the hormone that induces the feelings of infatuation with someone.

Fun Fact.  According to Helen Fisher, an anthropologist when you like someone, you spend 85% of your waking hours thinking about them.  

Everything reminds you of her

When you like a woman, your subconscious mind is constantly focused on her.  Every little thing you see reminds you of her: “Melissa would love this restaurant!’ ‘I wonder what she is doing.’  Even the book at the library seems like one she would be interested in. You keep having these little reminders because you think about that girl a lot and a part of you wants to be with her.

Fun Fact: “Phenylethylamine is also found in chocolate.  This may explain why you find it hard to stop after just one cube.

You are excited when she calls or texts you.

If you feel that what she has to say to you is more important than anyone else, the girl means something more to you.  It is as simple as that. Scientists believe that this single-mindedness results from elevated levels of central dopamine, a chemical that is involved in attention and focus in your brain.

You feel as if you are high when you are in their presence

It is completely normal to feel out of your mind when you are falling for some.  Scientists say that dopamine is responsible for this euphoria. When you are falling in love, there is heightened neural activity in the dopamine-rich areas of the brain.

Indeed, they further indicate that romantic feelings trigger activity in the area of the brain that is linked to obsessive thinking.

Research by Kinsey Institute revealed that the brain of a person who is falling in love resembles the brain of a person who has taken cocaine.  Dopamine is responsible for both situations. Is it any wonder people in relationships can sometimes act completely irrationally?

You just want her to be happy

Do you want to know you are falling in love?  It is not just about you anymore. Her happiness becomes really important to you.  You are willing to get out of your way to make her life easier and happier.

When her boss is treating her badly, you help her figure out what to do.  If she has a cold, you are at the store buying soup and crackers. When she gets into a fight with her sister, you distract her so that she can cheer up.

You are willing to bend your own rules and try new things.  ‘You want to eat at the vegetarian restaurant?’ ‘Yeah, sure!’  ‘And yoga afterward?’  ‘Of course.’  ‘Will you walk my dog tomorrow?’ ‘I would love to.’

Because you know what?  When she happy, laughing and so alive, there’s just nothing else like it.  This is love.

Research shows that people in love generally feel a strong sense of empathy towards their loved one.  They feel the other person’s pain as their own, and they will sacrifice anything for the other person.

You get jealous when you see her with someone else.

Do you get annoyed when you see her with someone else?  Jealousy is one of the most obvious signs that you like someone more than just as a friend.  Scientists say that people who are in love exhibit signs of possessiveness, jealousy, separation anxiety and fear of rejection.

Indeed, experts indicate that jealousy is actually healthy in the formation of relationships.  They say that jealousy is the adaptation that helps relationships to stay intact by making partners sensitive to potential threats.  Jealous people tend to be more committed to relationships.

You are completely engaged when you are with her

When you are with her, nothing else matters and time becomes irrelevant.

You will hardly notice the other people around you and you don’t remember to check your phone the entire time you are with her. As a matter of fact, there is nowhere else you want to be at that moment.

You are completely drawn to her, and you hang onto every word.  Your body language is different when with her. You find yourself leaning forward to listen more attentively.  She is like a magnetic pull that you have no desire or ability to stop.

In a study, researchers found that individuals who were in love found their passion involuntary and uncontrollable.  Many participants in the study expressed feelings of helplessness, indicating that their obsession was irrational and instinctive.

Indeed, they compare romantic love to addiction.  They say that lovers exhibit all the signs of an addict:

You feel a rush of exhilaration when thinking about her, you become obsessed with her, distort reality, change priorities or do extreme things to impress her or remain in contact with her.

Fun Fact: Romantic love is an addiction: a wonderful addiction when the relationship is going well, a horrible, disastrous, negative addiction when the relationship breaks down.  Lovers also relapse the way drug addicts do. After a relationship has ended, people, events, places, smells, songs associated with the abandoning partner still trigger memories.

So, you like her.  Now what?

Falling in love is a wonderful basis for a healthy relationship.  However, bear in mind that building a healthy relationship takes much more.  Before you approach the girl, remember that falling in love doesn’t last forever.

Scientists say that this phase is temporary and it either evolves into a long-term, codependent relationship that psychologists refer to “attachment” or it dissipates, and the relationship dissolves.

The staying power of your relationship takes commitment and mutual investment.

 

Thanks for reading this guide on how to know if you like someone – 7 signs you want more than friendship with her. If you have any comments of questions, then you can contact me here