How to Get a Woman to Like You When You’re Nervous

How to get a girl to like you - couple on date

How to get a girl to like you - couple on date

YOU HAVE JUST MET a woman that you think is gorgeous and funny and absolutely intelligent.

You are really attracted to her, and you can totally see yourself in a fantastic relationship with her… And you want her to be into you as well.

But do you know what to do?

One wrong move and you will be annoying and push her away, or you will find yourself in the darkest pit of the friend zone.

How can you create a positive impression and eventually make her attracted to you?

How to get a woman to like you

Be well groomed

Women are not hung up on physical features, but your appearance is the first thing they will notice.

Physical attraction is the initial attraction. If you are dirty, smelly and wearing clothes that look like they have just been thrown together, you may put her off and deny her chance to discover just how amazing you are.

How you dress is quite important

Research shows that females instinctively look at how a guy is dressed to determine if he will be a good provider for their family in the future.

A well-dressed guy sends the message that he is stable, goal oriented, and driven. When you want to impress women, wear clean clothes, trim your nails, comb your hair, and be presentable.

When seeking to attract a woman, your smell is of utmost importance

Your fragrance can intrigue a woman, sexually attract her, or even repulse her.

It doesn’t matter how good looking you are if you have a scent that turns off other people you have no chance of attracting her. Having a nice aftershave or scent of cologne will help.

Your scent should not be too overpowering. It should not overwhelm, but it should definitely be noticeable. She should only detect it when you walk by or stand next to her.

Be confident

Research shows that women cannot resist a confident attitude.

A guy who is comfortable in his own skin holds his head up high, is true to himself, and does not worry about what other people think is very attractive. A woman will be drawn to a man who believes in himself and is not afraid to be the man he wants to be.

A guy who is confident inside and out sends a strong message that he can protect his girl and his family.

A guy who lacks confidence communicates timidity and disinterest. This will cause her to keep her distance because she cannot trust him to be there when she needs him.

Be yourself

When many guys meet women, they do not present their ‘true selves’.

This is because they fear rejection. They feel like they do not look good enough or they are not charming enough. So instead of being themselves, they try to project an image that you think she will like.

Other guys are too worried about what to say to women: always weighing their words and jumping on every opportunity to agree.

Unfortunately, she will see right through you. Women can tell that you are not your authentic self and that you crave her approval. When she senses this, she will run for the hills. A woman respects a man who believes in himself enough to risk not be liked and approved of.

Remember, different women have different preferences when it comes to men. Therefore, not every woman will be attracted to you; and it has nothing to do with you. Be yourself and allow her to like you for you.

How to get a woman to like you - he is paying attention to her

Pay attention to her

When you are with a woman, make her feel as if she is only other person in the room. Even when people walk by, the music is loud, and the dishes are breaking, keep your whole attention focused on her.

Women love this… And they test for it.

Women who are interested in you will get their friends to sit next to you instead of them. They do this to test whether you really have an interest in them or if you’re just after ‘any girl’.

You can pass the test by keeping your attention on her. This is definitely a way to get into her good books in the right way.

Let her talk about herself

Often, guys struggle on dates because they try to keep the conversation going at all times. They forget that the one topic of ultimate interest for women is themselves.

And make no mistake, girls love to talk about themselves. If you master the art of listening to her, you will have the most fantastic conversation.

Simply listen, pick on the things that she tells you and talk to her about them.

She will appreciate that you show an interest in her and she will feel good emotions talking about things that matter to her. Consequently, she will associate those emotions with you. Within no time, she will feel a connection with you.

Next time you are talking to a girl, zero in on what matters to her and let her elaborate on it.

Mirroring

Girls want guys with whom they share some similarities.

Mirroring is a good way to show her that you are more alike than different. This is an incredible tactic because you do not even have to talk to her.

Mirroring catches the attention of the woman and communicates to her that you are a guy that she would find interesting. It is also a way of getting her to develop a true sense of trust because people generally trust people who are similar to them.

Research shows that when you mirror a woman’s facial expressions, it makes her feel attracted to you and she also finds you interesting, caring and intelligent. Some of the ways you can mirror include:

  • Smiling when she smiles
  • Turning your body in the same direction as hers
  • Nodding your head when she nods hers
  • Raising your eyebrows when she raises hers
  • Showing disgusting when she shows disgust towards something else

Although don’t impersonate

This doesn’t mean copying or impersonating her. It’s simply about showing her that you are in the same frame of mind at the same time.

Similarity attraction effect

We have already established that we are attracted to people who are similar to us.

You can use this to your benefit when listening to the woman that you like. Simply highlight the things that you have in common.

She says she loves country music? Let her know your favorite band if you also like country music.

Studies show that the more similar to a girl a guy is, the more she feels he is predictable, and her brain, therefore, thinks he is safe to be with.

Be spontaneous

You don’t have to do what every other guy out there is doing to impress her.

For instance, why don’t you use your talents to impress her? On a date take her to something that you are good at. Even if it is hitting range balls, she will see you at something you are good at.

This will earn you extra points because you are genuine and that takes extra time and effort.

The novel effect

Research shows things that are new or unusual activate the parts of the brain that invokes curiosity and consequently, attractiveness.

Separate yourself from the herd and do things differently and you will surely get her to like you.

Final thoughts…

Many guys allow their shortcomings to stand in the way of their love life.

There are many things you may not like about yourself…… and if you are not careful, you may allow them to erode your self-esteem

These are factors that you cannot control, and you should not allow them to stand in the way of your love. A great personality and attitude can help you to overcome all your insecurities.

Therefore, embrace who you are, turn them into your strengths and build your self-esteem. And remember, even the girl you are eyeing is not perfect. She probably has her own insecurities.

Thanks for reading this guide on how to get a woman to like you. For more information on meeting miss right, sign up to the email list.

10 of the Best Books on Female Psychology – An Updated List

Best Books on Female Psychology - Man and Woman Reading

Best Books on Female Psychology - Man and Woman Reading

SHE SEEMS HAPPY… but what is going through her mind?

  • Why did she break up with me?
  • What has made her go so distant all of a sudden?
  • Why is she with that guy?

If you’ve ever asked yourself these questions then this (updated) list is going to transform your life.

It contains the best (in my experienced and honest opinion) advice, information and education on women and why they do what they do

Some are new, some are classic books on female psychology. But they all have great ideas, concepts and insights to help you understand the women in your life…

1. For men only: A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women – Shaunti & Jeff Feldhahn

Think you know what she truly wants and needs from you?

For Men Only unlocks many of the mysteries that tend to keep the average man in the dark. Especially when it comes to building a deeper and more meaningful relationship with women.

You can expert to learn about what women think their insecurities are and what they mean when they use the term ‘security’ (which is very important to them)

From the best-selling author of “For Women Only”, this easy to read the book is full of practical information. With no real scientific language, it’s something any man can read today and feel more in charge of their relationships with women.

Get your copy of For Men Only here.

Pros Cons
Easy to read Over-simplified writing style
Includes a “Quick-Start” guide Denigrating language towards women
Plenty of practical information Written from Christian POV may not be for everyone

2. Crack the Secret Girl Code – Michael Fiore

Crack the Girl Code - Michael Fiore

Learn How to Push the Right Buttons

Crack the Girl Code is an online training program that provides men with “code cheats” designed to help get inside the minds of women. It focuses on creating an instant connection while at the same time increasing her sexual desires.

The course covers techniques to help you push three crucial buttons in a woman’s mind to make her feel that special connection and desire you.

Crack the Girl Code covers how to make that connection by making her feel as though you understand her better than anyone else. It also covers conversation tips to turn her on and how to make a woman feel like she is destined to be with you.

Several bonuses are included such as “How to avoid the Friend Zone.” You can find more information on exactly what else is included at the website here. (It gets a bit weird with the puppets)

Pros Cons
Perfect for the beginner No online forum for more help and information
Digital version for online reading Not for those who “think,” they are always right
60- day money back guarantee Not an “Instant” cure, it takes time for perfection

3. The Female Brain – Louann Brizendine

Science answers the question “What does a woman want?”

No matter what your current relationship status, this book will help you to gain a better understanding of the complexities of the female brain, in an easy to read and understand format

The Female Brain answers many questions you might have but were afraid to ask. Among those questions are, “Why do women tend to be more verbal than most men?” or “Why do women form stronger bonds with their female friends than guys do with their male friends?”

Find the answers to these questions and many more in between the covers of The Female Brain.

Pros Cons
Easy to understand, non-scientific language Contains inaccurate information in places
Should read by both women and men Fails to cover the elderly female brain
Concepts backed by medical science Stereotypes women a little

4. What Women Want When They Test Men – Bruce Bryans

How to decode a woman’s behavior and pass their “secret” tests


It only makes sense that women test men. But do you know how to recognize when you are being tested and how to react to it?

In the book, you will learn about the three “C”s, Congruence, Compliance, and Commitment, which are the three tests most women use.  

If you have ever been dumped by a woman, the book can show you how not to accept being treated this way. As well as how to start being treated in a manner of which you are deserving.

Crack the code and get your copy of What Women Want When They Test Men here.

Pros Cons
Follow up to What Women Want in a Man From a very dominating male point of view
Identifies the three “C”s women use to test men Might be best for short-term relationships
Teaches you to be a strong, confident man Repetitive in places

5. What Women Want in a Man – Bruce Bryans

Become the Alpha male women desire


In What Women Want in a Man, Bruce Bryan discusses the most important thing a woman wants in a man

And how communication and confidence are important, but not as important as her #1 primal drive. 

On the practical side, you will find ten ways you can start working on making the changes needed to make you a “woman magnet.” Learn why the “Nice Guy” always seems to finish last and end up alone rather than with the woman of his dreams.

Most importantly of all, learn how to become an Alpha Male, one that is more assertive and who is far more likely to be attractive to women. Discover what she really wants in What Women Want in a Man here

Pros Cons
Covers the traits most women are attracted to in simple manner Poorly written using a lot of generalities
Not filled with tricks and gimmicks that don’t work Repetitive information
Focuses on the male side of the relationship A little shallow

 

6. Make Her Crave You – Greg Hart

Make Her Crave You - Greg Hart

Are you a guy with his life together… well all except one part?

Make Her Crave You is more like a beginners system to help guide you through how to reveal that part of you that women want to see.

In this way, it’s more focused on guys who are successful in other parts of their lives.  And just need to sort out their relationship.

You won’t get any scripted lines here. In fact, the book is written on the premise that men simply have a problem demonstrating their worth to women (which I agree is a big problem that guys have). It’s not about changing you, more enhancing.

Make Her Crave You will challenge your beliefs and take you out of your comfort zone, so it isn’t for everyone. Get your copy here

Pros Cons
No lines or magic tricks A little dated
Focused on attracting the women you want Some parts are repetitive
Bonuses included A little more expensive than some other options

7. Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus – John Gray Ph.D.

#1 New York Times bestseller

This is the classic book on the subtle differences between women and men. So not only do you get to understand females better, you understand yourself as well

It has been updated, but the information is as good today as when it was first released. It covers how both sexes prefer to interact with each other, as well as how we think differently. And if you’ve ever heard of the ‘points system’ couples use, I believe it started here

There are a lot of analogies and John Gray has a great way of painting pictures in the reader’s mind to help explain topics

Get your copy (if you don’t already own it) of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus here

Pros Cons
Easy and entertaining read A little oversimplified
Chapters focused on language are good Parts on keeping love alive may not be relevant
Examples given Advice taken from observation rather than research

8. The Female Brain (Movie) – Whitney Cummings

A movie about why women do what they do

I know this list is about books… However, if you’re looking for a different perspective on learning about female psychology you might like this (even if it’s just for a change)

The Female Brain is loosely about understanding why women make the choices they make

The star (Whitney Cummings) plays a brain researcher who is explaining the different parts of the two brains (male and female) in this way.  Then there are examples played out by the couples

It’s light-hearted and good to watch with friends. It’s aimed at more of a chick flick audience but it can be good to go ‘undercover’ and learn from these types of resources occasionally. See it here

Pros Cons
Entertaining and light-hearted Not a book
Informative ‘Chick flick’ might put some guys off
A different take on what can be a dry subject Not as actionable and straightforward advice as others on this list

9. My Secret Garden – Nancy Friday

Where other books dare to tread

Written in the 1970s, Nancy Friday thought it would be a good idea to start documenting women’s fantasies. So she put an ad in the local classifieds and this book is what came back

My Secret Garden is a great book. And I recommend it, especially if your a guy who puts women up on a pedestal. It gives a real look at women and what drives them from this unique angle (their fantasies and innermost thoughts). It’s a real eye opener

Well worth the read but read it somewhere private. It is very graphic so that may or may not be to some peoples taste

Get your copy of My Secret Garden here

Pros Cons
Entertaining read Very graphic language
Informative No real ‘how to’ style content, more story based
Open and honest You’ll never look at women the same way again (might be a good thing)

10. The Language of Lust – Lawrence Lanoff

The Language of Lust - Lawrence Lanoff

Does talking about sex with women scare you?

Many guys aren’t sure of how to broach the subject of sex with women.

And although it’s only a small thing, it can leave you feeling like you’re missing out on something…

If this is you then The Language of Lust is a MUST READ.

Inside you will learn how to deal with your emotions as well as what to say and do with techniques you can use.

It will help you understand where she is coming from and how to interact with her around the topic of sex and intimacy (which can be a big sticking point for guys)

It isn’t for beginners or those with little to no experience with women, but if you’re up for the challenge the rewards are there. Get your copy here.

Pros Cons
Lots of practical application techniques here Not for beginners or guys that haven’t much experience with women
Great advice on the correct way to be outwardly sexual with women A little dated
Bonuses included The membership site is hard to navigate

In Summary…

The ten resources above are a crash course in what makes women tick, and why they do what they do.

If you were to only read one or two, you would be in the top 99% of men who don’t have a clue about the women in their lives. Many time the information in books on female psychology like these has helped me understand what has happened in my relationships

And that removes a lot of the negative emotion and guesswork that I see many guys still doing. My advice is to buy all of these and save yourself the 5 years of rejection and family visits alone. But that’s just me.

If you have a question about any of the resources above, then contact me here

My 10 Best Books on Pleasing a Woman – An Updated List

Books on how to please a woman - Woman sitting on edge of bed

Books on how to please a woman - Woman sitting on edge of bed

LEARNING ABOUT WOMEN ISN’T LIKE learning about other subjects

  • You can’t really ask her what she wants (she doesn’t know)
  • It’s hard to find other guys who will actually help you
  • And your friends probably don’t know what to do either

It can feel like you are either born with it or you aren’t

But rest assured there is help for the rest of us. Here are 10 books, videos, and other resources, to help you really understand what’s going on with her…

And how to make her happy, and loyal. Go through these and you will be the man that she will always remember, and never want to leave

1. She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman – Ian Kerner

Are you  “Ill-Clit-erate?”

If you are like most guys you may have far more idea of what hides under the hood of your car or the box on your computer than what goes on under the hood of the female clitoris.

Ian explains that for a woman, sex is more than foreplay and intercourse; it’s a complete package from start to climax.

She Comes First is a virtual encyclopedia of how to pleasure a woman, covering dozens of techniques that have been proven to work time and time again. Learning how to pleasure a woman can turn you into the man that she can’t stop thinking about.

Get your copy of She Comes First here

Pros Cons
Contains detailed instructions Poorly organized
Covers the art and science behind sex Repetitive
Shows you how to succeed without toys Deals mainly with oral sex

2. The Way of the Superior Man – David Deida

How to become a man’s man and more

In “The Way of the Superior Man,” author David Deida takes an in-depth look at every aspect of men’s lives.

He covers issues such as career and family, love and spirituality, and women and love. Deida offers advice designed to help men learn how to live a more masculine life. One of authenticity, integrity, and freedom.

The chapters are short and to the point, making the book easy to read. Providing you read the entire book and apply the lessons, you will find yourself becoming a far more confident man who is ready to take charge of his life.

I have this book in my bookshelf, you can get your copy here

Pros Cons
Chapters are short and to the point Ideas are somewhat archaic  
Helpful for those looking to build a long-term relationship Repetitive and excessive use of filler
Shows men how to focus on their relationship and to take more responsibility for it Overly simplistic writing style

3. Various DVD’s – Welcomed Consensus

Sex Ed. for visual learners

I know I said books but these DVD’s deserve their place in this list.

I first found Welcomed Consensus a few years ago. And when it comes to teaching sex and the woman’s body, I don’t think anyone does it with as much detail

Personally, I found it valuable because when you are ‘in the moment’ you may only have a small window to get it right. Whereas these DVD’s slow things down and show exactly what you should be doing, for how long, when to stop, etc.

Some may see it as porn, but I would classify it more as ‘instruction manual DVD’

If you need simple instructions with plenty of visuals, then this is the place for you. They have their entire catalog available here, as well as a few choice videos on Amazon

Pros Cons
Extreemly detailed Very graphic (not for everyone)
Simple to understand The production level isn’t great
Answers a lot of questions Videos are shortish (30mins)

4. The Language of Lust – Lawrence LanoffLanguage of Lust - Michael Fiore

Lawrence has written the upgrade most guys are looking for when it comes to getting more and better sex.

The book/program is set around the idea that the physical attraction isn’t everything. In fact, it is only a single part of the experience for a woman, and women get turned on more by the ‘story’ or lead up than by the act.

On the more practical side, there are plenty of techniques which make things easy to remember. It’s a great resource for men, single or partnered.

Get your copy of The Language of Lust here

Pros Cons
Plenty of techniques No hard copy available, only digital
Easy to understand A little dated
60-day money back guarantee Membership site hard to navigate

5. My Secret Garden – Nancy Friday

More than erotica, a real-life view of women’s sexual fantasies

Some see My Secret Garden as one of the most sexually freeing books written, while others see it as no more than pornography

My Secret Garden is in fact “a collection of women’s sexual fantasies,” which due to the nature of the topic is certain to be at least somewhat erotic

Although it’s a little dated, it’s rare that you will find women openly sharing their innermost thoughts, so there are new insights for men here. And I really like how straightforward and honest it has been compiled

My Secret Garden can enhance not only sex lives but also relationships and provide a deeper understanding into the so-called fairer sex. Get your copy here.

Pros Cons
Entertaining read No real practical element
Great insights into women Very graphic language
Informative  Gets a bit weird in parts

6. Sex, Your Woman and You – Don Asterwood

Don Asterwood has put together a real guide on how the average guy can please a woman

And his answer lies in three areas. Having confidence, the correct knowledge and applying the right technique

Much of what we learn from friends and movies is not really correct and doesn’t work as intended. This book aims to dispell those myths and show you what works.

It’s written in a language that’s easy to read and upfront about the advice in it. Get your copy of Sex, Your Woman and You here

Pros Cons
Easy to read Very specific about sexual knowledge
Frank everyday language This author may not be for everyone
Plenty of content in the book Not for advanced ‘users’

7. 500 Lovemaking tips – Michael Webb

500 Lovemaking Tips & Secrets

Is the sizzle between you and your woman starting to fade?

If you have been looking for ways to spice up your love life, 500 Lovemaking Tips is sure to help.

Filled with 500 tips & strategies that are easy to put into action, with step-by-step instructions to help ensure you understand each tip. The descriptions are well thought out and easy to follow, with as much detail as is needed to ensure you comprehend the entire concept.

Keeping the spark alight in your relationship can be challenging, especially if you have been together for a long time. By following these tips, you can rekindle the flame and turn it into a towering inferno.

Get your copy of 500 Lovemaking Tips by Michael Webb here

Pros Cons
Based on real-life experiences Takes a lot of reading
Easy to understand Only available as an eBook
Guaranteed results (money back) Can be overwhelming

8. Revolutionary Sex – Alex Allman

revolutionary sex - Alex Allman

Three Ways to Give a Woman the Best Orgasms She Has Ever Had

This is an excellent guide to sex for beginners to help them learn what it takes to truly satisfy a woman in bed.

You will learn how to overcome issues that stop a woman from having an orgasm and men from gaining an erection. Revolutionary Sex teaches you about the female anatomy and how to locate the “G-Spot.”

Learn about “sexual trust” and the importance for a woman to be unable to tell her partner about her sexual needs. Revolutionary Sex explains the importance of oral sex and how to perform it on both men and women.

The book also includes a female and male version as an audiobook. Available here

Pros Cons
Focus is on most important parts of sex Not exactly revolutionary information
Comes with male and female audio version Distinct lack of diagrams
Detailed instructions Text can be challenging to read

9. 100 Great sex games for couples – Michael Webb

100 Great Sex Games for Couples

More fun in the bedroom

100 Great Sex Games for Couples offers more than just 100 games for you and your partner to inject into your sex life.

There are plenty of books that do just that and nothing more. Author Michael scoured the world to find the best sex games, added a few of his own and unleashed it on an unsuspecting public.

The games in this book are refreshingly new, are not complicated or difficult to prepare for, and are neither degrading nor immoral. Treat your partner to some of the hottest sex they have ever experienced and leave them wondering who the new you is.

When your ready to play, your copy of 100 Great Sex Games for Couples is here

Pros Cons
Available as a PDF download Only available online
Easy to understand Contains 33 games and 67 variants
60-day money back guarantee Requires a lot of creativity and imagination

10. Turn Your Wife into Your Own Personal Sex Kitten – Michael Fiore

Text Your Wife Into Bed - Michael Fiore

Purrrrr!!!!

Text Your Wife into Bed will show you how to have your special lady seeing you as her personal love god all through the power of the simple text message.

Author Michael Fiore teaches you a variety of different ways you can text your wife that will turn them on and make them want you.

Success is achieved by following the four-step process in the book. The process is laid out in easy to understand language. Once you purchase the program, you get an audio file, a video, and the PDF to download. Get yours here

Pros Cons
Easy to follow and understand Success takes time and patience
Proven track record of success Use of “dirty” language
60-day money-back guarantee Only works for those who like texting

In Summary…

If you read, listened to and watched everything here, I cannot see you having a problem with pleasing women in your future

The truth is that pleasing women doesn’t start in the bedroom. It’s the type of man you are and how you treat your woman. I think as a whole, these books and resources reflect that

Now go and study and make that woman feel the way she deserves

If you are looking for resources on how to meet women then these books are more for you

Any questions on this article, the best books on pleasing a woman, contact me here

How to be Confident with Women & 2 Tips to Hack Your Self-Esteem

How to be confident with women - Guy talking to a group of girls doing cheers motion

How to be confident with women - Guy talking to a group of girls doing cheers motion

IF YOU ARE LIKE many guys trying to get better with women, you may think that all you need to appear more confident is do more:

  • Say more stuff to her
  • Have more techniques to approach her
  • Have more pickup lines

Unfortunately, talking too much is the perfect way to turn her off. A woman can always sense when you are over talking because you are nervous.

Why are guys nervous in the presence of women?

It is amazing how relaxed you are around your colleagues and friends, but the moment a pretty girl shows up, you are completely intimidated. Some of the reasons why guys clam up when they are in the presence of girls include:

Putting her on a pedestal

If many guys were to be honest, beautiful girls intimidate them because they (guys) put the girl on a pedestal before they even know her.

They feel as if the girl is a goddess and that they have to prove themselves and impress. Thinking like this will put a lot of pressure on a guy who thinks he always has to impress her and get her to like him.

The cure

Some will say that simply thinking this way ridiculous and you should try to talk yourself out of it. But from my experience this doesn’t work. The cure here is to meet (and date) more beautiful women. So that one exposure to a pretty woman isn’t as much of a big deal.

Being too hard on yourself

Many guys’ worst enemy is their own opinions about themselves.

You have a constant stream of thoughts that point out how less than perfect you are. You dwell on how you aren’t good looking; how you have physical flaws that need to be fixed; how you are a loner; that you have never kissed a girl; and that you are a loser…..

If you are too hard on yourself, you become insecure and eventually sabotage any chance you may have to be confident with girls.

The cure

While confidence and personality are more attractive to a girl than the things you are dwelling on. And you should consider for a minute that your looks and accomplishments probably don’t matter to a girl nearly as much as you think they do.

It’s hard to actually put in place. But I do have one way to fix this which is a bit of a weird one but it worked for me. Ready…

Create a different personality.

Yep. Instead of simply having you. Have different “you’s”. For instance if your name is John, you now have everyday “John”. And also “Good Time John”.

Everyday you is kinda shy around new people. He does his work and takes care of business at home, at work etc.

Good Time John goes out at night and has fun. He foremost interest is in having a good time and people who want to have a good time.

This is an overly simple explanation, but the theory behind it has helped me personally in many ways.

How to be confident with women - Guy singing karaoke with women
Singing can be seen as a sign you are confident… even if you are not a great singer

How to be confident around women

Everyone has their insecurities.

Being confident around beautiful women is not about never feeling insecure. It is about being comfortable in your own skin, and not allowing your insecurities get in the way of your pursuing girls that you are attracted to.

All confidence is acquired and developed. No man is born with confidence.

One big misconception by men that sabotages their efforts is that men have to do something to get the girl. Whether that is impress or talk or demonstrate something, etc.

Truly confident guys know that they DO NOT have to do anything. That it will happen naturally.

Analyze and destroy your self-sabotaging beliefs

Insanity is defined as doing the same thing over and over while expecting different results. If you have been struggling with feeling confident around girls, it only makes sense to see what scares you and where it comes from.

For instance, let’s say you have approach anxiety. Have you ever stopped to contemplate why you have it? Why should it be so hard to walk up and say ‘hi?’

Maybe in the back of your mind you think that people are out to get you because you were abused or bullied in your past. Or perhaps you are scared by women because your mother smothered you as a child and you always feel inferior around girls.

If you taketime to conduct a thorough analysis, you would possibly realize that most of your anxiety has nothing to do with the girl standing in front of you.

Instead it comes from experiences at various stages of your youth and adolescence. If you objectively examined what went wrong and sought for ways to deal with your past situations, you would move forward in your dating life.

Manage your expectations

Many guys fear to go to women out of fear of rejection. They are insecure, and they take rejection too seriously. Expecting to always score a date or a relationship after approaching a girl is putting way too much pressure on yourself.

Change your mindset. The worst thing that a girl can do is to say no.

The first thing you need to realize is that rejection is not personal and it may be as a result of things you have absolutely no control over.

Regardless of your game or lack thereof, many times you will be rejected. Rejection is not meaningful until you empower it.

Also, do not put too much meaning into your interaction with her. Would you care if a random guy you did not know decided that he did not particularly like you? Then, why do you allow the opinion of a girl you have only briefly interacted with matter so much to you?

Treat an attractive girl the same casual way you would treat a friend or an unattractive girl.

Do not pedestalize the girl

The ability to take a girl off the pedestal is the difference between being successful with girls and being unsuccessful.

Treating the girl you are attracted to like a regular person and not like an idol is critical to your success. Treat her with dignity and respect her, but do not let her hold power over you while you grovel at her feet.

As stated above the best way to cure this is to meet more women. The more interactions you have, the less important each one becomes.

Take it one step at a time

The idea of approaching a woman and carrying out a conversation beyond the initial ‘hi’ can be daunting for many guys. However, you can gain confidence in your conversation skills through practice.

Start by saying hi’ to women as you walk down the street. You don’t even have to start a conversation; just smile, say ‘hi’ and don’t break your stride.

This may sound all too simple but make a habit of it. Get friendly with the girls you regularly see; at the coffee shop, the fast food place, the library. Make a few remarks as you order: get them to make a suggestion and engage them in a brief chat. With time, you will get comfortable talking to women, and you will build some confidence.

Gradually start to throw out some banter and then seek to further the interaction by making the conversation personal. Within no time, you will find that you can build sexual tension.

The point is always seeking to build your skills by taking your next interaction a step further than the previous one. Keep at this, and you will be confidently talking to women in no time.

Just go for it

When you want to approach a woman, you probably find yourself hesitating.

Unfortunately, when you hesitate, your mental barrier kicks into place. It becomes even harder to approach the girl. The longer you think about whether you should approach a girl or not, the more anxious you will feel. As such, you need to act more upon that first impulse.

Your first impulse is your best shot at actually approaching and talking to a girl. All the thinking that you do after the initial intention to approach only serves to scare you.

If you don’t move fast, you will either talk yourself out of approaching the girl or do it awkwardly. If you wait to feel utterly confident to approach a girl, the chances are that it will never happen. Give yourself a few seconds and get your feet moving towards the girl.

Momentum is an incredible thing. It is hard to get moving, but once you start moving, it is hard to stop.

One last tip

Do you still need some extra push to gain confidence? You can use affirmations before approaching the girl. Tell yourself something positive:

The outcome doesn’t matter; I am sexy; women enjoy talking to me.

Have a few affirmations that resonate with you to get motivated to get out there and do it.

The final approach

The beauty with approaching women is that there is so much you are in control of:

  • You decide whom to approach
  • Your attitude towards the girl
  • Where you are comfortable approaching
  • How long you want the interaction to last
  • How you treat the outcome of the interaction

When you realize how much power you have over the situation, you will feel empowered and much more confident to approach girls.

Do not give your power away by pedestalizing the girl, looking down upon yourself and assigning too much meaning to rejection.

How to Approach a Woman – The 7 Traits of a Successful Single Man

How to approach a girl - A girl

How to approach a girl - A girl sitting at a resteraunt

“HOW DO I APPROACH A WOMAN?” IS  probably the most common question asked by single guys everywhere.

The answer to successfully approaching a woman exists in your attitude.

And when I say attitude, I also mean your mindset/outlook/ethos.

It is your attitude when trying to attract a woman that determines how much success you will have. And this is where many guys go wrong; they try to figure out the appropriate pickup line, the perfect body language, or the classic joke.

Forget all that.

The only thing that matters when approaching a woman you like is your attitude. Develop the right attitude, and it will not matter how old, broke, fat, or intelligent you are.

As long as you have the wrong attitude: you think she is better than you, you feel that you do not deserve her, and doubt your abilities to attract her, you stand no chance.

Now is the time to get into the right mindset, get out there, and start meeting those remarkable women.

1. Confidence

Confidence is a strong presence and purpose in a guy that is often contagious.

Scientifically, confidence plays into women’s desire to want to mate with the leader of a pack. When a guy is confident, he makes those around him feed off his energy and feel empowered. Confidence draws girls in because it communicates that you are a guy worth liking.

The girl wants you to take the lead, but you cannot lead without confidence. If you have ever asked a girl ‘Where would you like to go?’ Most probably, you received the answer, ‘I don’t know. Why don’t you pick somewhere?’ In other words, she wants you to lead, even if she will probably never tell you.

Women want a man who can make plans and reach a decision. Even if she disagrees with your decision, she will tell you, but she will always respect that you take the lead.

From asking the girl out to making a move, to initiating sex… it will be your job to lead.

Remember, fortune respects the bold.

2. Conviction

Conviction is powerful. When you are approaching a girl, you must believe that you deserve her and you can win her over. Many guys are very good at coming up with excuses not to approach attractive girls:

  • She probably has a boyfriend.
  • She’s out of my league
  • I don’t want to make a fool of myself
  • She is probably sick of guys hitting on her

If you are not convinced that you can win girls over, you will always stand in the way of meeting amazing women.

There a huge difference between thinking, ‘I am the prize’ and ‘I am not good enough for the girl.’

One writer noted that the men of the previous generations when narrating how they met their wives always say something like:

“I noticed her in a local charity event in the neighborhood. I had never seen her before, but she was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. She just lit up the room. I knew there, and then that I was going to marry her……’

This is the conviction that we are talking about. Having this kind of self-assurance that you are worthy of the girl is great. It gives you the confidence that you need to approach any girl and tell her how you feel.

3. Respect

Many guys think that women want to be with bad guys, but they could not be further from the truth. Girls are attracted to a man who shows them respect.

Some guys are yet to realize that yelling across the street, grabbing girls to dance and harassing them in public does not earn their attraction.

In fact here are some counter-intuitive ways that will show her you respect her and get her attention…

Apologize

When you approach a girl, apologize for bothering her before you say anything else. “Pardon me for interrupting…” “Excuse me, but…”

Introduce yourself

The next step is to introduce yourself so that she knows who you are. Do not launch into a speech you have planned before at least introducing yourself. “My name is Tom and I ….”

Choose your compliments wisely

The easiest way to make a girl feel insulted is by commenting on her body. Choose you compliments wisely otherwise, you will end up sounding like a jerk and offending the girl.

TIP – Comment on something she has done/chosen/earned. “I couldn’t help but notice the way you…”

Accept her decision

At any point during your interaction with a girl, you may be met with resistance. If she says no, do not be rude or mean about it. Tell her it was nice meeting her and be on your way.

Approach a woman with respect because if she respects herself, she is not going to accept anything less from you.

4. Mystery

Mystery brings excitement, uncertainty, and anticipation. Do not be a predictable guy doing what every other guy out there is doing. Be spontaneous and add some mystery to your ways.

If you are mysterious, it also eliminates the risk of coming across as needy or desperate. Surprising the girl with unexpected gestures will make her attracted to you.

Also, do not lay it all on the table during your first meeting with a girl. Keep a little to yourself so that you can intrigue her and make her want to know more about you. You should always send the message that there is more to you than meets the eye.

5. Loyalty

Many guys cannot keep themselves from flirting with every girl around them. You are eyeing a particular girl, and yet you are flirting with other women around her. What message are you sending her? That you are not ready for a committed relationship; that you are addicted to the attention; you are selfish, and you will neglect her in future?

How to approach a woman - Many girls at the bar

Do not show attention to other women

If you are clearly interested in a girl, do not give any attention to other women. When a girl realizes that you have eyes only for her, she cannot resist.

You can interact and socialize with other women but if there is a girl you like around, ensure that she gets the message that you only have eyes for her.

If you clearly send this message you can make her feel like the sexiest woman in the room, and she will definitely be interested in you:

  • Do not look other women up and down in front of her.
  • Do not watch other girls walk away
  • Ensure she is an integral part of the conversation
  • Acknowledge her more than the other women around.

6. Authenticity

Unfortunately, a lot of information out there on how to attract women is based on playing games. However, the games always end up more hurtful than attractive and women have become attuned to whether you are being yourself or not.

A girl will be more attracted to you when she is assured of not falling in love with a man who turns out completely different once he feels like he has her in his grip.

7. Patience

Many guys do not know how to hold back their desire for a girl. They come on entirely too strong too fast. They want to speed up their romantic and sexual encounters. Unfortunately, women are more process-oriented, and they are keen on the dates, conversations, and emotions.

Experts say that a guy can decide if he wants to have sex with a girl within a few seconds and he immediately shifts into finish line mode. Girls, on the other hand, take time to decide if they like a man because they take a lot of things into consideration.

In the initial stages, a girl just wants to have a good time. If you throw too much affection too fast, too soon, you will scare her off.

Take your time to ensure a girl is comfortable with you and feels secure before you can broach the subject of intimacy. Your interaction will be more meaningful when you allow it to develop organically.

Finally,

Have the attitude that you are taking a risk, like others that you have taken in other areas of your life. No guy goes ten for ten when approaching women.

This attitude will help you not to take rejection as a judgment on you as a person. If you allow rejection to shatter your self-esteem, you will never find that special woman.

So this is the right attitude when approaching a woman: it is a risk and rejection has nothing to do with you.

It is not your fault. It was probably bad timing, or she was having a bad day, or you probably resembled her nasty boyfriend (Yes, it could happen). Expecting success all the time is setting yourself up for emotional paralysis.

If you are after more information, here is what you can say to a girl you just met, and a few quick tips for shy guys when it comes to meeting women.

I hope this article has answered some of your questions on how to approach a woman.

How to Attract Younger Women & Use Your Age to Your Advantage

How to Attract Younger Women - A woman and man enjoying a hot drink together

How to Attract Younger Women - A woman and man enjoying a hot drink together

HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT to yourself that it was not possible to attract and date younger women?  You think: ‘cute girls would never date an old geezer like me!’ Or ‘why should I bother approaching her?  She’d just tell me that I am old enough to be her dad’.

You are so wrong

Let us get something straight.  Young women are actually attracted to older men.  Clinical psychologist, Sasha Lynn says that there are many reasons why young women are attracted to older men.

The older man is more confident and secure in himself and is more settled in his life and career.  His life is much less chaotic, and he is perceived to be more experienced socially as well as sexually.

Many young women feel that guys their age just don’t ‘get it.’  They want an older man who is in control of himself and his environment.

Furthermore, many studies suggest that women mature faster than men.  It is no wonder, therefore, that a younger woman might feel more comfortable with an older man.

A perfect match: Older men and younger women share the same need for connection.

Consider the following facts:

  • Young women have a massive need for connection. While they are busy building their careers, their main focus is to create lasting relationships and establish a family.
  • Young men, on the other hand, are more focused on the need for significance. As much as they may have relationships and want to have a family, their main focus is figuring a way to make it in the world.
  • The older man has spent his youth looking for money and power, and he has probably achieved them.  He is tired of the rat race, and he is looking for more connection.

A younger woman and an older man are compatible because they are both seeking for more connection.  She wants to settle own. He may be wanting to start a second family so that he can get it right this time since he neglected the first one in pursuit for money and power.

How to attract younger women

Your age does not have to be the stumbling block to a beautiful relationship.  Long lasting relationships are possible, even despite a huge age difference:

Donald and Melania Trump have an age difference of 23 years, George Clooney and his wife Amal have a 17 years age gap, Bruce Willis and Emma Heming have an age difference of 24 years, Alec Baldwin and Hilaria Thomas have an age difference of 26 years…. and the list is endless.

Indeed, your age can be to your advantage when you are seeking a younger woman.

Change your mindset

Many guys are attracted to younger women, but they refrain from approaching them because of societal programming.

  • I shouldn’t date a woman that young.  It is just not right.
  • Everyone will think I am shallow if I date a woman that young.
  • A relationship with a woman that young would never work.  We are in completely differences places in life.

You can never have the younger woman that you desire if you harbor such thoughts in your mind.  There is absolutely nothing wrong, immoral or unethical with wanting to date a younger woman. After all, we have already established that young women are very attracted to older men.

How to attract younger women

Act your age

Many older guys think that the way to attract a younger woman is by acting younger.  This is not necessary. Trying to be something you are not is never attractive. Do not go around saying you are 29 while you are in fact 40, or telling people that you are 60, but you feel as if you are 35.

Embrace your age.  Be who you are:  you do not have to pretend to be what you are not to impress a younger woman.  Remember, there are tons of younger women that are looking to date older guys. Pretending to act younger when you are an older man is an easy way to get rejected by younger women.  Learn to play to your strengths instead of your weaknesses.

Ensure you are compatible

To stack the odds in your favor, ensure you share common interests with the younger woman.  Sometimes, the generational differences can be huge, that you have to ensure there is enough potential for a long-term relationship if that is what you are after.

Further, ensure that she is not looking for a father figure.  This is huge. Some girls have had bad relationships with their fathers, or they just never had fathers.  Looking for an older man might be their way of looking for a father figure.

They are looking for a provider, a protector and someone to nurture them: someone to fill the gap.   They are not looking for an equal relationship. This is not the kind of relationship you should sign up for.  It will never work.

Ensure that she is not only open to dating an older man but that she understands the challenges that may come with it.

  • Is she ready for people to say all sorts of things about your relationship?
  • Will her parents and siblings might disapprove of the relationship?
  • Is she comfortable hanging out with your older friends?

Be adventurous

While you want to be mature and adult, get a renewed thinking: you must be adventurous and fun to be around.  Young women are wild and adventure seekers.  The best way to connect with them is ride on with their curiosity and imagination.

  • Let her take you on adventures that you would never consider going on by yourself.
  • Take the initiative; be exciting and daring and let her do things she never thought she would do before.

This is one of the most powerful things you can do to keep a young woman interested.  You will both have a blast.

Be her rock

There is no doubt about it. While all women are emotional, a younger woman will have a lot of drama going on in her life.  Whenever she freaks out about something, you must not let it get to you. Learn to stay calm. Do not try to fix her problems and do not try to stand in for daddy.  That is one of the things she will love about you.

She will love that you can remain cool under any circumstances.  Remember, one of the unique offerings you bring to the table as an older guy is your stability and non-judgment.  So, be that rock and see what happens.

Keep the lines of communication open

The age differences might include differences in perceptions and role expectations.  Discuss your expectations with her.  Maybe she wants to have a child while you feel that you are past the age of having children.  Talk as much as possible so that neither of you misunderstands the relationship.

Prepare yourself for continuous change

When you are dating a younger woman, remember that she probably still have a few years of figuring herself out.  Keep an open mind and be ready to go with the flow.  Do not restrict or hinder her options.  Also, be prepared for the possibility that she may not be with you in the next few years.

Deal with this fact and be ready for it: New careers, new relationship expectations, new lifestyle and many other things will come into her life as she grows into a more mature woman.

How to deal with the “How old are you question.”

As we conclude, the question that older men dread the most when approaching a younger woman is the question: “Wait a minute, how old are you?”

Fear, nervousness, and embarrassment engulfs you and are at a loss how to exactly respond.

Should you tell your actual age and risk rejection

Or

Should you simply lie and hope that she never finds out how old you really are?

The secret: Ask the question first

This helps you to beat her to the punch and ensures that she is on the defensive instead of you.

Envision the following conversation:

You: How old are you?

Her: (Truthfully her response doesn’t matter as you already know she is younger)

You: Oh, well…. You’re a bit too young for me.  I don’t think a relationship with you would ever work.

Her: But… (She will try to qualify herself, listing all the reasons why the relationship between the two of you would actually work).

Do you see what is happening here? You are disqualifying her because of her age and using her young age as the reason why the two of you cannot hook up. You have flipped the script, and instead of chasing her, you now have her chasing you.

The close…

Not all women will want to date an older man, but there is many who will after their not so fulfilling experiences with guys their own age. So if you get a few weird responses then try somewhere else.